Exclusive With Pattinson & Shittiano

Finally I am Back Ladies & Guys, I dnt have any gentlemen reading my blogs so had to write guys. Well I was thinking to you know get ‘in’ with the ladies, I spent weeks thinking how to get a guy like me ‘in’ with the ladies and then it hit me. I decided to interview two people who are in a weird sort of way ‘in’ with the ladies. I mean believe me they don’t have any connection with the ladies what so ever but still the ladies love em and I thought if I could get an interview with them which will surely get me with the ladies

Yes Ladies and Guys I am talking about Robbert Pattinson a.k.a Edward Cullen (RP) & Cristiano Ronaldo a.k.a Shittiano Ro-Naa-Laado (CR0)

X: Welcome To The X Show, Where we call some brilliant celebrities and have a talk with them, after the brilliant success of the show with Sir Arsen ‘Insane’ Wenger now its time to go even bigger. Today 1^st guest is none other than the heart beat of the female section of the world and the hate nd beating part of the male section of the world please welcome with a big boo “Robert Pattinson”

RP: Thank you very much for calling me at your show

X: Oh no worries, believe me if I had a choice you won’t be here :P

RP: What?

X: Nothing, dnt want to make you angry and bite with those teeth

RP: Ha ha ha ha, dnt worry I only bite girls

X: Why scared of the men?

RP: No, its something else

X: What? Is it true?

RP: What is true?

X: You and Jacob?

RP: Hey that’s personal stuff man

X: What u and Jacob working in the new twilight movie is personal?

RP: Oh I thought you were talking about something else

X: What something else?

RP: Nothing nothing *makes the puppy dog eyes at me*

X: Dude believe me am not that kind

RP: What kind?

X: A vampire, I am a normal human being what were you thinking you are acting weird Robert

RP: Oh nothing your shirt is nice

X: Ahan m feeling a lil uncomfortable over here

RP: Want me to give you a massage?

X: Oh no lemme call my other guest now, people he is a model and a brilliant and emotional actor but I dnt know how in the hell did he made it to soccer? Yes WOW my audience is so intelligent. It is none other than Cristiano Ronaldo a.k.a Shittiano Ro-Naa-Lado

CR0: Hey *smiles*

RP: Oh you new here?

CR0: You don’t watch soccer?

X: Even if he did, he won’t find you thea, you should ask if he watched the latest Clear Shampoo add

CR0: Yeah it was about football as well

X: Dude Whoopie Goldberg did an add containing a baseball bat doesn’t make her a baseball player does it?

CR0: You are just jealous of my greatness

X: Please you are no MESSI

CR0: MESSI, WHO IS MESSI? MESSI IS CRAP, CRAP I TELLS YA #*$#%$**#$%@%#$$*#@*#*$*#*#*$*#*@*$#**$

*slaps him*

CR0: So where were we?

X: We were talking that Lionel Messi is the best footballer in the world?

CR0: MESSI, WHO IS MESSI? MESSI IS CRAP, CRAP I TELLS YA #*$#%$**#$%@%#$$*#@*#*$*#*#*$*#*@*$#**$

*hits him on the head with the mic*

CR0: So where were we?

X: I asked you that do you think that you can be called a great footballer with a 63% accuracy, you are nothing do you understand?

RP: I don’t think that way, I think Ronaldo is amazing

X: Ermmmmm, nothing forget it I said that we were just discussing how you lost the champions league this year

CR0 starts crying

CR0: it wasn’t my fault, I tried, believe me, I tried mommmmmmyyyyyyy………. I need my mommmmmyyyyy…….. Please stop with the questionsssss L L

RP: I am hea for you

*RP hugx CR0*

*CR0 starts sucking thumb*

RP: Don’t cry papa is here for you, don’t you cry or m gonna give you a lil spanky wanky

CR0: *while sucking thumb* Papa I have been a good boy

X: AHEM AHEM ………MY EYES MY EYES

*faints*

*gets up and sees both of them*

X: Ladies and Gentlemen this show’s video will not be allowed to be on AIR on national television and please don’t try and even search it on YouTube for the sake of humanity

X: I am sure I don’t want any thing to do with the ladies, please ladies keep these two with you and don’t let them wander alone, till next time with something and someone better at least my whole camera crew is almost dead and I am getting out of here. X Y’All

Ending With Beautiful Pictures Of Both :P

An Exclusive With Wenger

Ladies & Gentlemen

Welcome To Today's Blog

Today's Blog Is An Exclusive Interview I Took From The British Club Arsenal's Manager "Arsen Insane Wenger"

Never Knew That Was His Middle Name? Well I Didn't Knew A Lot Before This Interview & It Cleared A Lot

Nd After The Interview I Gave Him The Honorary Title Of "Sir Arsen "Insane" Wenger" :-D

Let Me Waste No More Time & Head Straight To The Interview

X: Welcome

Wenger: Hello, how are you?

X: I am absolutely fine sir, how are you today?

Wenger: Am good, Thanks for asking

X: So sir first of all let me ask you about the latest Cesc Fabregas related news?

Wenger: What about it?

X: Well to start with, why are not you letting Fabregas complete his dream?

Wenger: Well first of all I will clear a fact that Fabregas is allergic from trophies. There I said it. The man gets a severe case of good footballing skills whenever he gets near a trophy like these days after winning the World Cup he is constantly practicing and I have no idea for what reason. Here at Arsenal I can safely make sure that Cesc is kept away from any trophies what so ever like I have all this time, the cob webs in our trophy cabinet always refresh him. While with BARCELONA's continuous habit of winning trophies every year I am scared that BARCELONA will ruin Cesc's career by making him one of the best footballer's of all time. What does BARCELONA know about Cesc. BARCELONA gave Cesc to me when he was sixteen, BARCELONA doesn't know anything they don't know at what time Cesc likes to watch cartoons and BARCELONA doesn't know at what times does my lil Cesc likes his favorite meal. BARCELONA knows nothing

X: Oh-kay, why do you shout when you take Barcelona's name?

Wenger: I dont shout while taking BARCELONA's name

X: Yes you did, right there. Are you obsessed with Barcelona?

Wenger: Ha ha ha ha ha ha, Why would I be obsessed with BARCELONA? Although BARCELONA is that club that humiliated us, BARCELONA is that club that whupped us, BARCELONA has that MESSI that scored a record 4 goals on us, BARCELONA has 7 players in Spanish team due to which Cesc never got a chance to play in World Cup 2010 and defeated Persie in the final, BARCELONA is a club that ripped us from our dream of Champions League this year, BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA

BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA

BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA

X: Sir? Hello? Wenger Bhai?

Wenger: BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA BARCELONA

Smacks a stick on the head of wenger and he gets up

Wenger: See am not obsessed with BARCELONA. I am only doing this for Arsenal's good not over BARCELONA's hate

X: Ahan, yea I can see that. Please make sure you don't see the telecast of this interview on television

Wenger: Why?

X: Oh nothing, well the last question why did you reject Barcelona for giving Cesc and after 2 hours put Cesc on the transfer market for 53 Million and then went home and came back to say to the press that you never want to give Cesc away?

Wenger: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, that was a practical joke. See I was going against my own words, geddit geddit? ha ha ha ha ha.....damn I sometime crack myself up with such a great sense of humour

X: Indeed :-S , Any cool message for anyone?

Wenger: BARCELONAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ...... has an A in the end with which Arsenal begins. See am not obsessed

X: Yes I can see, It was a very very strange time with you, hope I never get this oppurtunity again and I will not be airing this interview as I don't want to scare the kids.

Wenger: The pleasure is all mine

X: Oh-kay

Well thats it

I know it was awesome wasn't it

Wenger is an awesome guy

oh am sorry Sir Arsen 'Insane' Wenger :-)

Till Next Time

X Y'All